Nuts & Bolts - Case Study : Retaining the Flock

Challenge: Retain churchgoers.
Solution: Mobile marketing, sending daily text messages.
Results: Of the 125 church members and attendees who participated, 100 percent have remained worshippers.

Taking a leap of faith, Relevant Church of Tampa, Fla. invested last year in database management software from Fellowship Technologies of Irving, Texas. In one of its first challenges for the software, Relevant created a mobile marketing retention drive.

"We had a series that we called TEXT," Administrative Pastor James Adair says. "It was a study of the Bible, a play on the word, obviously. What we wanted to do was to help our people get to interact more with scripture on a daily basis. So we tried to find an apparatus to communicate with them that was relevant, already ingrained in their daily life. So we said, ‘Well, what if we text message them Bible verses for the day?' You could always e-mail, but sometimes you get that later, when you're already at work." 

The church posed the challenge to its attendees one Sunday, and 125 opted in to read scripture every morning for 30 days. After pulling worshippers' cell phone numbers from the Fellowship One database-the Fellowship Tech software Relevant Church purchased to keep track of its growing flock-Relevant sent out the text messages. New congregants who weren't yet in the database filled out contact cards, which the church then added.

"Just because you have somebody come to your church for years, [sometimes] they don't actually grow in their faith, or they don't go anywhere with it; it's just like somebody coming into your restaurant and not buying any food," Adair says. "You want them to start growing. So by getting them into Fellowship One, we can track their progress. We can tell if they go to a small group. We can tell if they attended church. We can tell if they give money. We can tell if they've taken any ‘action steps.' So, during the TEXT series, if they signed up to receive text messages, that's permanently in their record[s]."

Of the 125 who partook in the TEXT action step, Adair says 100 percent are more than still attending-many are joining in on more challenges. Now Relevant Church has scheduled different retention drives twice a year, amid the 2008 "Year of Challenges." Worshippers have new goals to meet every 30 days, such as the recent "We Are Relevant" push in October to define the church's role in their lives and in the lives of the community.So, at a time when Adair says average church attendance is static to slumping, Relevant is growing. During the past year, Relevant's overall attendance has grown by more than 50 percent, from 230 to 350. 

He credits a large part of this growth to the collected data that allows the church to enhance its ability to service the congregation's needs. For instance, if the information shows 20 percent of the attendees live in a certain Tampa neighborhood, the church can create a small group meeting for the area that can even cater to its demographics-young and single or married with children-and perhaps have a better chance of retaining 
those worshippers.

Meanwhile, those who've grown up ensconced in traditional religion probably never thought they'd see the day that churches became savvy marketers. But that day is here, Adair says. 

"We put a ton of effort into marketing. A ton," he says. "Because it's got to be something that people who don't go to church are interested in. If you send out a black and white, boring, cut-and-paste bulletin, that's no good-well, who's going to be interested in a church like that?"

But what matters most to Relevant's ministry is reaching those in the pews with God's message. As Adair puts it, if Relevant markets "to these people halfheartedly, well then, they're going to think we think of our God halfheartedly."

When Serving Sucks.

 

Paul used an illustration few weeks ago with two types of fish tanks. He talked about fresh and salt water and how the two types of fish can’t mix. Here’s the tragic back-story behind what you saw on stage.

Saturday night I set up the tanks. Beach sand and ocean water made the salt tank and the fresh water tank came from Walmart. I could have bought small fish salt water from the pet store, but bigger fish from my home 75 gallon reef system would make a better point.        

Sunday morning at 7:00am I attempted to catch the fish in my home aquarium. They kept hiding in the rocks. I started tearing the tank apart to get these fish. Buckets filled with siphoned water protected the rock and coral I pulled out of the tank. With in minutes my pristine home tank was in shambles. My kids, stood in their PJ’s, are staring at me.

Finally, I caught my first fish, then the second. As I looked for the third, I saw a yellow snout sticking out from under a large rock. Ahh. I moved the rock and realized that my final catch would never move again; he was crushed.

Ironically, this is the same fish I freed previously from the deadly grip of a clam. Me and my yellow fish had a delayed appointment with destiny. Off to Relevant.

I dumped these Caribbean fish into 62 degree water. I’m sure they remembered the comfortable 81 degree tank they just left. I ran down to the cantina to set-up for children’s ministry. Tim Mann greeted me with a cheerful smile; a smile I could not return. He asked if he could help with anything. “Not unless you can raise fish from the dead” I responded.

The fish in question, were valued at $150-$180 each. The dead one would have fetched $120. All of these fish were at least 9 years old. I gave them 2 pinches of food daily, for 2 years. I brought 15 gallons of new water to the tank weekly. They experienced dawn, daytime, dusk and even moon light. I even scooped their poop. My sons knew them as Nemo, Dori, and the Yellow one.

While I was laying tiles in the children’s area those thoughts raced through my mind. “Why am I so angry?” I wondered. I was not not angry at God, but at myself. I went all out for this illustration. “I could loose everything”. Laid another tile.

 

Carl and the band practiced upstairs; loud as usual. I laid another tile.

Jesus paid it all,
 All to Him I owe; 
Sin had left a crimson stain,
 He washed it white as snow.

 

And when before the throne 
I stand in Him complete, 
I’ll lay my trophies down
 All down at Jesus’ feet.”

 

 

I began to weep, quietly. Laid another tile. I started to see all my selfishness. I was committed to making this illustration work. I never imagined how much my commitment would cost. I never considered how much work it was going to be. Two days of prep unraveled 2 years of nurturing. I never thought I would lose something I cared for. Laid another tile. As Carl sang the refrain again, “Jesus paid it all, all to him I owe”, I felt terrible that God gave his son and I could not give a few fish.

Serving has a cost. Serving is not dependent on our feelings. Faithful serving is a process of letting go of ourselves one bit at a time.

 

 

You are my Beefsteak.

I have a small garden growing in my yard. One of the starter plants that all new gardeners use is tomatoes. My first tomatoes were cherry. They were small and totally useless. They grow fast and rot quickly. This season I picked larger breed of tomato; Beefsteak.. Here is what I didn’t know. Big tomatoes take a whole lot longer to grow.  After months of watering this plant its like 6 foot tall. But only in the past few weeks have the tomatoes started budding.  They are still green but I can finally see the fruit beginning to grow.

         I planted two identical Beefsteak tomato plants. Both are tall and both take a lot of work. One is producing fruit and the other has buds but no fruit. Not one. The plant is totally useless. I guess I could use it as a hedge or give it as a house warming gift to an enemy.

         There are lots of believers in the kingdom. Unfortunately, some take lots of water and care yet still they don’t give back. They keep all the nutrition for themselves. They, like this tomatoe plant have forgotten their purpose.

         On the other hand there are those believers who step-up, step-out and produce fruit. They find their place, and they make a difference. YOU are a part of the people at Relevant that produce fruit. Some-times it takes a while to see the fruit in others and often it takes longer to see the fruit in ourselves. Be assured that God has been watering, pruning, and caring for you all along. 

Distractions.

I was playing Racquetball this morning. It did not go well. I found myself highly distracted. Being a medicated ADD person, I know that I am medically superior to the average Joe. But most of the time we are a highly distracted people. We find our minds wandering from one thought to another.

            I found myself thinking: “How bad will this market crash be, 1980’s or 1920’s? Why don’t the kids clean up their own crap? I hope my wife feels better. Who is on Facebook? My house value is down $80k. Why is everyone I know sick or broke?” Oh wait I’m playing Racquetball- get in the game.

An old boss I used to work for always pushed me to limit the number of distractions in my life. I thought he was Scrooge-ing me. Surly he was watching out for himself. In reality he wanted me to focus on the few things that would feed my family. As I observe myself, and the remainder of humanity, I notice that when times get tough we find even more ways to become distracted. More often we will relish in thoughts of misery. We get stuck in our own experience that we can’t see that we are in the middle of a game we care about. We forget what is at stake. It is the Kingdom of God in people’s lives; a game far more important that Racquetball.

Whether on Sunday morning or during the week in a Growth Group each of you takes a role at Relevant. I am so glad that you have a laser focus on the most important priority in your spiritual service. I am thrilled when I see volunteers who could be shootin the breeze with their friends down-stairs; instead they engaged a new couple in conversation. This kind of laser focus resulted in the visitors signing up for a growth group and coming to Carefest. I know it is hard to keep distractions out of our minds but by serving something greater than ourselves we add value and meaning for eternity in the lives of those we touch. 

I got my first.

6:45am: A frantic wife calls to her loving, and still asleep, husband,  “Hey, the fridge is broken.” Apparently the coils froze over. So Carly and I moved all the food out into the shed fridge, and for three days, we made trips out to the shed fridge to make dinner. Once, I even thought, “You know you’re a redneck when you find yourself in the backyard, barefoot, getting milk out of your shed fridge.”

Finally, with my trusty cordless drill in hand; I began the process of removing the panels covering the frozen coil. Ethan came over to help his dear, old dad, and you know how the story goes. He had to have a job. I gave him the job of holding all of the screws that I extracted from the panel.

Then it happened. All of a sudden, without warning and without prompting, Ethan said it. Words I had not heard from him before.  At least, not without coaching. He said it, my jaw dropped, and I wasn’t sure what to say, or how to respond. “I love you, dad.”

 

How long do we serve in an area of ministry and desire to hear about the difference we make?  How long have we served without being served? How long have we wanted to know that someone felt cared for, because of what we are doing? One day it will come.

Despair Factory Bailout

A family waits in the hospital for a doctor’s coat to approach with news. A wife wrestles with her distant husband’s addiction to bottles of all kinds. A man driving his 4-cylinder beater car sighs as he realizes that he has not actually filled up the tank in over a year. A man with a credit score of 705 contemplates if he should just let the house go. After all it’s worth $100,000 less than what he paid for it. Pastors of young vibrant new churches gather to figure out how to keep their doors open.  Taxpayers all over the nation are bracing for the fallout from the Fanny and Freddy default. Presidential candidates recite a nation’s despair, offer promises, and then ask for a vote.

 

            It seems just about every place one looks despair abounds. Its almost like in the cosmos a factory exists. This “Despair Factory” has an assembly line working over time to produce difficulties. Some difficulties are even customized. It seems like so many are in places of despair.

 

             Hindus call it Karma, while the Buddhists call it “The four passing sights”. What happens when our time of shock has past? How long will we savor the words “your fired”, “recession”, and “I’m pregnant”? In the west, Americans don’t reflect on despair, rather blame is assigned to everyone but the troubled. We find ways to relish in our misery. There are entire sections of daytime TV set aside to enjoying misery.

             

When trouble comes along people’s eyes glaze over and incapacity sets in. Any foreclosure defendant will attest the paralyzing effect of impending doom. What does it take to snap out of it? Where is the big restart button? What bailout is needed to bring hope back? Maybe the question is ”How can hope be used to bailout the Despair Factory?”

 

At the very basic level hope offers purpose to our struggle. Most often, hope offers a sense of better days ahead? Paying for next week’s gas and praying for healing asks hope for an immediate action.  Hope itself does not fill a gas tank nor does it heal. But hopeless place themselves at the end of the despair factory production line repeatedly. Hope offers reason and purpose to great struggle. Martin Luther held hope in the midst of huge struggle. Yes the original Martin Luther and Martin the King had at the core of their message purpose to their struggle. Hope fueled their drive for change. Don’t confuse hope with a campaign slogan or marketing piece. Hope naturally encourages action for those who have internalized it.

 

For believers in Christ we have a dualistic approach to hope.  We know that God makes Earthly provision. Believers also know that the calling of Christ has hope of salvation. Often the big picture of faith is lost in the details of the day. The wind blows and masses follow the dust it created. We know that troubles we face have greater implications. They fit into God’s greater picture. Even those things that seem meaningless, God weaves into the mosaics of our faith. There is a time for mourning. And there is a time for action. Let us weep with those who mourn.

 

Ironically, some believers respond to any adversity by looking for God to console rather than convict. Let us spur on those whose hope has been stolen by life’s circumstances. Some call it “putting on the big boy pants” while others call it “pushing the baby out of the nest”. So how do we snap out of it? Is it the bootstraps or surrender before God? Both. Dark clouds are momentary.

 

People who make it through great trials have some of the following traits. Setting aside the blinding effect of life’s trials will be the biggest challenge.  

 

·      Gain a realistic perspective of just how good or bad a situation is.

·      Stop talking about what you can’t do, start doing what you can do.

·      Essentualize-Get back to the basics.

·      Change your mind, starting with your tongue.  Speak the good, silence the negative. The tongue has power. It starts plenty of bar fights and secures many first dates.

·      Gain wise outside perspective. The kind that’s hard to hear, not blindly comforting.

·      Pray for God’s guidance on the tangible stuff: “Should I pay my rent or go to a movie?”

Faith or Wisdom

Ecclesiastes 1

 12 I, the Teacher, was king over Israel in Jerusalem. 13 I devoted myself to study and to explore by wisdom all that is done under heaven. What a heavy burden God has laid on men! 14 I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind. 15 What is twisted cannot be straightened; what is lacking cannot be counted. 16 I thought to myself, "Look, I have grown and increased in wisdom more than anyone who has ruled over Jerusalem before me; I have experienced much of wisdom and knowledge." 17 Then I applied myself to the understanding of wisdom, and also of madness and folly, but I learned that this, too, is a chasing after the wind. 18 For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief.

Questions:

Why is the wisest man unfulfilled?

Is the acquisition of wisdom a dangerous pursuit?

Is this comparable to the tree of Good and Evil?

 Reflections:

In my circle of influence it seems that health is the topic of the day. I can’t remember a time when more people in my life have been dying, sick, or dealing with a family member’s drama. Many church workers have prematurely passed away. I have been watching how people have reacted to their traumatic situations. Some turn to prayer. Some turn to grief. Some stand in shock.

In two cases I have observed what truly seems like miracles. When I left the charismatic movement I didn’t leave the idea that God could heal. But I did stop looking around every corner for a demon or a miracle. One person lay on the hospital table receiving CPR for 30 minutes. Most people don’t normally come back. Another person involved in a typically fatal motorcycle accident, still lives. The man is in his late 60’s not his 20’s.

When I get the phone call about these and other less fortunate medical situations, I feel my faith sink. I find myself knowing just enough about medicine to know when its real bad. I’m not a doctor, but I have seen a lot of these end-of-life situations come along. Words like DNR, Aneurism, and Melanoma have more power than my faith. I wonder if the more I know, will I become more like the son of King David? Jaded, sorrowful, and grief stricken. Just maybe blind faith is wiser than wisdom that destroys faith. 

Open discussion about some pictures I observed.

Setting. This Orlando mall is at least 1/3 empty. No food court that I saw. The exterior had a make over but not overly convincing.  There is a lot of competition by other huge pretty malls. This is a dying mall looking for stores and customers.

Here were some learning lesions I thought of, what are your thoughts.

 

Casting vision: Maybe the owners were trying to cast a vision of what the mall could be one day.

Sustaining: Maybe the mall was trying to do the best with what they had left to deal with.

Deception: Were the owners just trying to fool shoppers with the perception of more stores then what really existed.

Church application: How many churches feel like they have nothing to offer compared to a mega church. They have facilities that don’t meet the use they once had.

Business plan: Maybe the property needs to be sold as office space.

 

Golf and faith

I was playing golf this week: it was my third time playing. The ironic part is that I don’t really think I care much for golf. It’s okay to play but horrible to watch on TV. That being said, I had the good fortune to play on a really nice course. It was not one of those with the windmill and water fall colored toilet blue, but this course was really nice. So nice that I had to wear a shirt with a collar. As we passed the second hole a woman from the resort approached us and offered cold towels. I wondered what I needed a cold towel for, it was free so I took it. As the day grew hot I realized just why the cold towel was going to be important.

            At Relevant we get a chance to go over the top to meet the needs of those who visit Relevant. Both physical and spiritual needs are met by our team. From the water at the front door to a warm hello that comforts the soul. Thanks for caring unexpectedly to those who need it the most.

I got it.

I got it.

 

11:46 Pm Sat. night. This week has been so busy that I just could not come up with one encouraging thought to put in my First Impressions e-mail: then tonight it hit me.

            Some of you know that I cook. I have worked with Mise en Place while at college and during catering season totaling 11 years. It’s great fun & hard work. I see a lot of the same people and there is a deep sense of community shared among people of the food industry. Tonight there was a wedding: little did I know that when they said they needed me that they really meant it. There were four chefs on the gig, two of which are clearly much better chefs than I. Without going into all the details our team was under a huge time crunch. We only had to pull together “passed appetizers”, “3 appetizer stations”, and seated salad and dinner course for 278 people. All in 3 hours.

            To put this into context I know I can cook, I know that I have a decent palette, but I know in reality I am small potatoes compared to the REAL CHEFS from Mise en Place. The night went on mostly without a hitch. As the DJ played the song “ This is the Last Dance”, the lead chef on the gig, Larry said to me; “Thanks for busting it out tonight.” I did my usual “ thanks for letting me be on the team”. Larry knew I brushed off his complement and he followed it up with “ What do you mean, we couldn’t have made it without you tonight.” I was underestimating what value I brought to the team. I don’t know if you’re like me; where you forget what value you bring to those people in your life. When I realized that Larry really appreciated my help tonight I felt great.

            Some times on a Sunday morning I will give a compliment or two that seem so over the top that I must not really mean it. I tell someone on my Relevant Team that what they do matters, and because of the way I say it or because they might view their job as insignificant they don’t believe my compliment. Rest assured I DON’T GIVE vain compliments.

            See for Larry the restaurant is his only life. When you guys walk into Relevant to serve you are walking into my life. You bring what you have to offer not only to me but more importantly to God. I want you to know from my perspective that I can’t do it without you. From God’s perspective, He created the Heavens and Earth and still includes you in accomplishing His will.

Thank you for moving tables, counting money, greeting and tearing down. Thanks to all of you; Amanda, Andrea, Anthony, Ben, Erin, Bill, Tina, Camille, Kristin, Shannon, Chenelle, Angela, Chris, Chris, Clay, Darren, Julie, Katie, David, Dave, Derrell, Edwin, Krissi, Elysia, Dory, Eric, Greg, Carly, Jason, Jenna, Jennifer, Jenny, Jerry, Janet, Allison, Jim, John, Jonathan, Michelle, Jonathan, Katrina, Ken, Kiani, Kimberly, Donna, Kyle, Lauren, Katy, Matt, Melissa, Sharon, Mike, Philip, Nicole, Rebecca. There is more but I don't have emails, It's staggering to think 68 of you make Relevant happen, In my team alone. I am truly humbled.

Thanks again,

Jamie

            

A non-political statement.

The season is upon us. A time when a nation interviews candidates for the future position of President. Relevant does not take political sides, but we are excited that Relevant does reach people who are all over the political map. Disclaimers are done, on with the story.

Americans usually look for what the next president will do for them. I guess that’s why he is being elected; to do something right. Unfortunately, most elections in America are based on issues that the voters are unwilling to personally get involved in.

 

• We vote about education- yet most don’t teach.
• We vote about underprivileged children- yet most won’t find time to mentor.
• We vote about health care – yet most don’t go to the gym.

 

I have found myself noticing in many of you a strong desire to take matters into your own hands. Kind of like vigilantly servants. You decided at some point, “I am not going to stand by and watch other people serve in causes I care about.” You made a choice to “be about change”. Every time you serve you are voting for what you say you believe in. Not the kind of vote that creates a hanging chad, lost in the Electoral College. Rather, this vote directly impacts real people. I say you guys will have a greater influence on more of your neighbors than the next occupant of the large white house on Pennsylvania Ave.

 

Thank you for “Asking not what the God can do for you, rather what you can do for your God.”

 

Jamie 

This week’s schedule. 

FI and Freaking Sweet Surgery!

Yesterday I had an amazing opportunity to a long time goal. I have been wanted to observe a surgery. An orthopedic surgery would offer the best of “wood shop” and “home ec”. Less than 1% of the world’s population has seen the inside of an operating room. I got to sit in on five cases. I literally was only feet away from the action. None of this watching TV or youtube stuff, the real deal. I will spare you the details but just know that there was a lot of drills, screws, and nails.

Here is an interesting observation I had before getting to operating room. The doc’s assistant told me I needed scrubs on. She pointed to the Dr. dressing rooms, “change there”. She knows I know nothing about medicine, or even how to look like I know about medicine. I wondered, did I need to take off my clothes or did the scrubs go over my clothes? Lucky for me, I passed a few docs on the way in and it looked like they were naked under those scrubs. When in Rome do as the Romans do right.

On my way out I grab a hat and a Home Depot hazard mask. I quickly found out that real doctors don’t wear those types of masks. As I cross the red line into the operating ward a nurse tells me, “Hey, put your hat on”. Glad she told me.  Then we entered the room with all the washtubs, “Hey, now put on your mask”. Glad she told me. As I entered the room the doc warmly greeted me.

My plan was to fold my arms, touch nothing, and observe everything. They were using all these fancy terms; distal, proximal, medial, and flux capacitor. I located myself just over the doc’s shoulder but really close to the instrument table. A nurse tech reminded me, “If you bump the tool table, everything would have to be resterilized”. Bad day! I’m glad someone told me. Doctors and nurses went out of their way to include me in as much as I could handle.

I have never felt more like a fish out of water. Yet, this was one the greatest moments in my life; I had way to express it. Many people wondered why I would find surgery so interesting. But hasn’t that been said regarding religion?

Non-religious people come to Relevant with folded arms, touching nothing, and observing everything. We can’t tell if they love it or are completely lost. Here is the great part; Relevant gets a chance to welcome observers weekly. The result of our work is not mended bones, but mending hearts. Thanks for your commitment to telling a broken world that they matter to God.

 

Jamie

 

Here is the schedule for the week.

 

FI and Freaking Sweet Surgery!

A fish meets a clam

A fish and a clam meet in an aquarium. Cute fish is the top of the food chain. 34 cent clam as food is the bottom of the food chain. Fish snaps at clam.  Clam bites back. Yes the clam caught the fish by the snout. Fish struggle for life. Clam forced open to save the $120 dollar fish.  

Moral of the story: Know what your worth, but you might want to watch where you stick you nose.

Family Reunion

I had a family reunion this week. While I was diverting my attention from what the in-laws were doing. I checked E-mail, and did a little work. A voice from behind the sliding glass door asks me to help with dinner.  Potatoes needed to be mashed. I could have put them off till Jimmy Buffet was done singing "It's five o'clock somewhere." My retreat into work related tasks was being challenged by dinner.

 I don't know if your like me, a master of mixed priorities. I find myself doing what's captured my mind, rather than what I need to do.

• In the short term, potatoes were turning to mush instead of mash. Children play at the pool without a parent. Long awaited snorkeling adventures put on hold-again. 

• In the long term an unguided mind does lots of things poorly. Children have a half present parent. Spouses settle for unengaged relationships. College years turn into memories rather than marketable skills. Great ideas fade into could've and should've.

We need time to work, time to play, time to love, and time to worship. Often various passions compete for attention. We forget to focus on direction rather than fickle thoughts of the mind. So here is what I learned while mashing mushy potatoes. Figure out what moment your in and live in that moment as best as you can. 

Training Video

Jury Duty

This week I have the privilege of serving as a juror. Yes I got the paper and showed up. I charmed my way right into the juror's seat. Before they select you, they ask a battery of questions. Most of which filter out people with biases. The court tells you that, serving in the Jury system is critical to what America stands for. When you walk in the room everyone stands in your honor. It's a pretty important roll. Here is the ironic part. When a case is being deliberated jurors must only consider evidence when rendering a verdict. We can NOT think about the further implications of our actions. Such things as will the defendant lose a job, or serve hard time. But at Relevant it’s like the roles are reversed. No one stands when volunteers walk into serve at church. But we are very much so deciding peoples fate by serving at Relevant. We must keep that in mind as we serve. The court battles for the jurors’ attention.  The hearts of the world are begging for attention. The question is, will we rise to the occasion.

My chubby 1 year old cuts through silent chaos to remind daddy to love.

I guess that often you have days like mine. Days where you tell the wife, "hey I will be home in an hour", and that hour turns into two. Well recently I had one of those where I called Carly with my intended arrival and could hear the kids in the background grinding away at her patients. 

When I finally arrive home, late, I notice dinner sitting coldly on the counter. Carly was finishing the boys bath.  I could tell I was walking into tense moment. Dinner was reheated and plates abruptly put on the table. Each boy was put in their seat. 

Carly and I both had one of those days and shared very little in way of conversation. You know kids never just behave. Each screaming their own dinner objections. Ethan whines about his nuggets and choice of juice cup. Connor pushes away his bottle. Carly and I fire back with frustrated grunts and a "just sit there". Carly hands Connor a musical greeting card to keep him busy. Ethan continues his protests.  

Then in an unexpected moment of silence Connor, my chubby one year, old opens the greeting card. The first utterance of noise encouraged Conner's biggest smile. The song begins to play " All my love my darling, I hunger for your touch." I began to feel again. My eyes warmed with emotion. Just about cried on that one. 

See this was the card left over from Mother's day. It seems lessons memorialized on such a day can be forgotten so quickly. My son helped me remember how much I love the one who does so much.

Unexpected smiles

Every Sunday I find myself in the smile business. I encourage greeters to welcome people into our church. Some their first time in church.  Churches are so concerned with a welcoming atmosphere they spend millions on environments and higher staff to make sure people feel comfortable. 

Yet, I found myself at an event that correlated with our current series, swetin to the 80's. An 80's skate night.  Complete with a costume contest, and couples skate. Being the 80's generation the staff loved the idea. As of last Sunday we had a few sign-ups for the event and even if it flopped at least we would have some fun. 

People started trickling in on a Tuesday night. Most adorned with some sort of 80's garb. Some went over the top. Shaved mullets, incredibly tight leather pants, and who can forget all the neon. Heres who I didn't expect to show up. People who were barely alive in the 80's and adults who were past there prime in the 80's. We had them both, and everybody in between. People who had never skated and those who had some left over skills strutted their stuff. 

As the night wore on I realized the greatest phenomena, Smiles. Real legitimate smiles. Our age group is so jaded. We find hope in our pessimism. We rejoice in failure. But of this brief moment all the oil prices faded. For a brief moment the election was forgotten. People were having fun. I guess we all get used to being happy enough to think everything is all right. When was the last time we just had a blast? Tuesday, May 20th at 6:30pm.

The last Lecture

This is the story I might have told some of you about. Its all over the internet, Oprah and 20/20.  The part that really hit me is telling the truth. Not that I like lying is easy but difficult conversations need to happen. Often I wonder how much more I would lay it all out on the table if I had nothing to loose. The long version is worth watching. But the short version from Oprah or 20/20 gives a fair summery of his story. Randy's non-spiritual truths make me look at where I spend my time. 

 

Enjoy the long version.

Enjoy the short ABC Version ....Great....

You'll shoot your eye out.

My wife and son return home from Target where somehow he received a reward of a toy. In fact two squirt guns. His first sentence to me was " these are for the pool and you can't point them at people." Shortly there after Dad and Ethan go out side to play with these weapons of mass amusement. Mom is off on another errand. After watering the garden with the guns dad's squirter turns to Ethan's legs. Oops did I do that? Dad asks. Before long dad and son are in an all out squirt war. Ethan says "We just can't get my jammies wet."  Soon there after Mom returns only to see dad and son covered in water. Most can guess where this goes, mom runs for cover as her men lob gallons of liquid fun in her direction. 

Some rules are made to be broken. Guns are serious and safety adds sobriety to many moments between father and son, but breaking free from rules together is liberating. Dad catches himself when he sounds like a personal injury attorney rather than adventure mate. 

In a final moment of rule breaking dads squirt gun runs out of WATER. What to do. Ethan offers his remaining squirts in turns. We proudly stood as civil war combatants, each taking turns shooting at the other with bursts of laughter in-between.